I have the most amazing wonderful Husband and Children and our life couldn't be better! Nothing can disrupt us.......or so this is what I am thinking. Wow I have got to stop doing that (thinking that is). Things have been going GREAT. The kids are doing fabulous and everything is falling into place perfectly. We have heard NOTHING from the kids mom in months and they do not even ask about her anymore. They Amber has started counciling and understands her mom is not healthy and that her mom is not healthy for her no matter how much she loves her mom. Sometimes the people we love are the most emotionally detrimental to us. She is learning this the best way an 8/9 yr old can.
She has moved on and has excepted that her mom is not around. She has even said she feels better in her tummy not having to see her mom. Kids can tell when things are not right or good.
Well for the upset.....Her mom shows up out of the blue on her birthday. She hides down the street (like a coward) and has her 11 yr old come to the door. She knows damn well she would not have gotten to see her had she just came to the door so she sneaks like the snake she is. She has presents for Amber's birthday. Amber comes back in the house crying. Ironically she doesn't ask why or when she can see her mom she asks why her mom thinks it is ok to not call or anything for months and then show up with presents like that is supposed to make her feel good. She cried for awhile and asked why her mom was selfish and didn't think about her and Brandon and the other kids and only thought of herself and Brian. That was a question that really has no answer at least not from our point of view....that is not something we could explain to her.
Then she said "no offense to my mom. I love her and all, but your a much better mom than she is". Then fell into me crying. She asked why her mom couldn't be a good mom like me. How do you answer that? I do not know why this lady does not make her kids important. Money is the only thing that really matters to her. I have no real explanation for her. All I could say was to pray for her. Amber is already realizing her mom is not good.....and that her mom buys her affection. It is really sad if you ask me. Amber also said she wishes her mom would just leave her and Brandon alone cause all she does is confuse them.
The next day Amber asked me if you always love someone who is not good for you. My sister replied to her (as her dad has been absent most of her life). She said "I do not love my dad. I do not hate my dad. To be honest I really feel nothing for him. He is just another person as far as I am concerned. I do not want anything bad to happen to him, but I have no real feelings towards him." Then Amber perks up and goes "Yeah that is how I feel. I just didn't know how to explain it". This poor little girl should NOT be going through all of this. It is NOT fair to her.....mom needs to walk away until she is ready to be a healthy person in her chilrens lives.
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