So God is doing some major work in my life. This is both very exciting and very scary. To make it worse I do not know how on board my husband is with the whole thing and that scares me.
I made a debt thermometer and posted a number that was a reach, but pretty likely obtainable ($25,000). In the back of my head I had a larger number ($30,000) I had not spoke this number to my husband as he wouldn't be able to feel it or see it. Yet God was speaking to me of an even larger number ($48,000). My mom and I were talking and she felt got was telling her I am supposed to pay off $100,000 in debt. I do not see this without God. In no way can I fathom that number.
Well I am a very analytical person. I analyze everything over and over again especially when I cannot see the probability of it. I know we serve a mighty God, but I will be honest that number scares me. We do NOT have a 6 figure income how are we going to pay off 6 figures? Well I may not see it, but God does so I will put my trust in him.
This last week I have been feeling we are supposed to sell our van. I am not sure if this is me (trying to figure out what God is doing) or if this is from God. I asked a friend how do I know if something is me being analytical or if it is from God? His reply was that I was asking an analytical person who has back up plans for his back up plans so he had no idea, but how was I planning to pay of $100,000 in debt? I froze. I had not shared that number with anyone at all.....that number was between mom, God, and myself. I looked at him and asked where he got that number? To which he replied that is what came to mind....I take that as confirmation, but that is still a VERY scary thought. $100,000 I honestly do not see it....I can't even imagine how. I am trying hard here to believe it.
I really truly do know and believe God can do it. He is the almighty who can do anything. I am excited to watch this year unfold. I am excited to see my husband grow in his faith. This year is going to be exciting.
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